Confidence and Vulnerability

Embracing vulnerability can transform your life and unleash your inner confidence..

I want to talk about how taking small steps into vulnerability can lead to soaring levels of self-assurance and confidence. But first, I want to explain a balloon metaphor to set the stage for our discussion.

I did a reel on this recently, here is the LINK. Essentially these two balloons are intertwined by our thoughts and emotional states.

Imagine this [Blue] balloon symbolizes confidence, and the [Red] one represents vulnerability. When we squash the air out of one balloon, it fills up the other.

Ok that’s a fun little trick, right but so what?  Well, when we apply this concept to our lives we’ll discover how embracing vulnerability can inflate our confidence and empower us to grow beyond the boundaries of our comfort zone.

Flipping the Script

I think this space is changing, but when we think about dating and relationships how many of you would make the first move and ask someone out on a date? If you buy in to traditional gender roles, this is often left up to the man… to do, right?

So let me ask you this: have you ever considered ‘flipping the script’ and stepping into the shoes of the traditionally empowered person?

That’s right, I’m talking about asking someone out!

It takes courage to be vulnerable, putting yourself out there and risking rejection. But true inner confidence comes from pushing the boundaries of your comfort zone.

When I was growing up in the UK, I was often the one being approached by guys. So much, that it never dawned on me to be the one to approach them. The idea of being vulnerable and laying my heart on the line first, never entered my head.  Then I moved to Australia and while I was still being approached, the relationships I had were very hit and miss.

So I decided to flip the script and start thinking about what I wanted, who was I attracted to, what character traits I liked and who, I thought, was worth opening my heart to. I eventually asked someone out for the first time in my late 30’s.

I was nervous, but you know what? Taking that initiative empowered me, regardless of the outcome. It was a small step into vulnerability, but it led to a profound sense of confidence and self-assurance.

I want to encourage you to flip the script in your own lives. Take a leap and embrace vulnerability. Ask someone out, share your feelings, or initiate a conversation. You might be surprised by the sense of power you gain!

Rising from the Tower of Self-Doubt

Now if you’re still following along, there’s probably a tower of self-doubt emerging as you think about being vulnerable. So let’s address that tower of self-doubt in the room.  It’s the one many of us find ourselves trapped in.

The tower is where we hide away, avoiding vulnerability to protect ourselves from potential pain. But you know what? That tower is also holding us back from living our greatest potential.

Let me know if any of these sound familiar? They are the building blocks of the tower… Fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of not being liked, fear of being judged—these are all barriers that keep us confined.

But the good news is that these are just self-imposed limitations, meaning you created them, which means you can change them.

So how do you do that?

To free yourself from the tower of self-doubt, you need to take small steps outside of your comfort zones. Share your passions, express your true self, and embrace vulnerability. As you dip your toe in, you’ll might be amazed at the liberating feeling that comes with being authentic and vulnerable. I’m sure you’ve experienced at some point in your life.

For me, in my late 30’s, I shifted from being a less mature version of myself, where the world was happening to me, to being a woman shaping my own narrative and taking charge of my life’s direction.

I learned that being vulnerable wasn’t a sign of weakness, but a demonstration of strength—a willingness to be open, honest, and authentic in a world that often masks vulnerability.

No More Excuses: Take the Leap

I’m not going to lie—embracing vulnerability can be intimidating. We tend to make excuses to avoid stepping into the unknown. But know that the difference you seek lives at edge of your comfort zone!

Our minds may try to protect us from potential risks, but our inner growth lies beyond our fears. Each small step we take outside of our comfort zone builds resilience and increases our confidence.

Think of a time when you took a risk and embraced vulnerability. Maybe you applied for that challenging job, shared a creative idea, or asked for help when you really needed it. Those moments of courage often open doors to incredible opportunities and personal growth.

Embracing Vulnerability, One Step at a Time

So It’s crucial to remember that you don’t need to dive headfirst into vulnerability. Small steps are more than enough! And its important to Celebrate your victories, no matter how small they may seem.

I’ve made a note of 4 steps you can try to get you there…

  1. Identify the boundaries of your comfort zone: Recognize the areas where you tend to avoid vulnerability. And opt to stay in your comfort zone. Start there.
    Might be putting things off, not speaking to someone you really like, avoiding your boss instead of asking for a pay rise/bonus/holiday leave, might be avoiding that difficult conversation with your partner, friends or family…
  2. Set achievable goals: Start with small, manageable steps that take you outside your comfort zone. Visualise yourself doing the thing and practice wherever possible. Share with someone you trust and feel safe with.
  3. Celebrate your progress: No matter what happens everything you experience is an opportunity for learning and growth. So acknowledge and appreciate the courage you had for stepping out of your comfort zone.
  4. Embrace self-compassion: More than anything, be kind to yourself, even when facing setbacks. What did you learn and what will you do or say differently next time?

The Journey of Vulnerability and Confidence

Remember, embracing vulnerability is not a one-time event—it’s a journey. There will be ups and downs, moments of vulnerability, and moments of confidence.

Embrace the idea that vulnerability and confidence can coexist. (show the balloons) There will be times when you feel more vulnerable, and that vulnerability will lead to moments of immense growth and strength. In essence if you want more confidence you need to be prepared to go where you have none and that requires being vulnerable as you embrace new experiences.  

To recap; todays idea is about embracing vulnerability in order to unleash confidence…

Flip the script, rise from the tower of self-doubt, and take the leap into vulnerability, by stepping out of your comfort zone, even with a tippy toe dip momentarily. Embrace your journey, knowing that vulnerability and confidence are not mutually exclusive but interconnected.

As you continue this journey, remember the words of Brené Brown: “Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.”

Thank you for joining me today, and if you’d like to discuss this further, send me a DM… I look forward to hearing from you.

Tzara 🎈💪